un ano!

back at site safe and sound. i've resigned to the fact that i'll have this cast forever. some people have been great. i got off the bus and this woman asked if she could brush my hair for me right there in the lobby. ok, that's kind of embarrassing; you look so jenky that even random strangers can't help but feel sorry for you. :( in my defense, i can brush my own hair. in fact, i've learned to do quite a few things. however, on that particular day, i was actually trying to go for the ruffled, poofy hair look that i thought was quite attractive. but unbeknowst to me, i had a big clump of knots in the back. oye.

so it's been a year since i've been in peru. overall, i can't complain. although things haven't turned out exactly as planned, i've been extremely lucky--time and crying have been able to fix most things. and who would have thought that i would be trying to open a soup kitchen in the midst of learning spanish and adusting to life in peru?

lately, i've been getting into spanish music. i listen to this song, "colgando en tus manos" several times a day. it's full of sappy lyrics of "my heart hanging in your hands so be careful, be careful...don't let me fall." sigh, see, i told you it was sappy! :) i think it's been a good distraction to the solitude and loneliness that i've felt through the year. it's been a good and bad thing. before i left the states, i wasn't sure if i considered myself to be a strong, independent person. now i think i'm a little tougher...a little better. :)

and now the biggest challenge is moving on from the accident. the cast is a constant reminder and it's been made harder by the fact that i still haven't told my family apart from my siblings. keeping secrets have never been easy for me; it's always been easier to tell the truth. but without them being here, i feel like it would be selfish to put them through so much worry. i wish i could tell them so that they could help me make decisions. i've been thinking if i want to get the rods taken out of my arm soon instead of going through physical therapy, regaining control of my arm, only to go into surgery and get casted again. i would love to know what my dad and aunt think, but it'll just have to wait. they would freak out.

so, for now, i'm going to spend my next and final year doing the best that i can...learning spanish and the keyboard (piano), working on the soup kitchen project, and begin to appreciate the consistent meals of potato, rice, and bread.

ps one funny story, my family here really loves their wall-sized calendars. my room had 12 when i first arrived and another volunteer and i counted 17 hanging in the livingroom. i came back from my Lima trip this time around and saw a new addition in the bathroom. yep, even you can't escape knowing exactly what day it is even while doing your "negocio."

pss because we're feeling nostaglgic today, i'm posting a photo from my good bye to katie luncheon a year ago. it's of me and my cousins.